18 August 2009

Headline News Commentary or “Say What Now?”

I am a huge fan of CNN Headline News. I know it hardly counts as actual news, but it will do. Today was just a banner day for stuff that made me want to scream obscenities at the TV. (On a side note, the plan to start using “pickles” and “tartar sauce” a la SpongeBob Squarepants so as to curb my cursing habit near the toddler is totally failing.)

-Oklahoma? More like Assahoma. So great plan that all women seeking abortions have to receive an ultrasound. Regardless of how you feel about the issue as a whole, this seems a little like we are creeping up on “cruel and unusual” here. Do women who are victims of rape or incest really need to be put through this. Additionally, not all elective terminations are actually “elective.” Anyone who has had to make that choice does not need this kind of politics to get involved. Finally, this is not about a person’s right to choose, this is about not being forced to undergo unnecessary medical testing against your will.

- They guy who orchestrated the huge credit card fraud ring…while working for the government to stop credit card fraud? Love it. I guess real life is nothing like “Catch Me If You Can” although that was real life I suppose. Maybe that is where he got the idea…

- People are bringing guns to areas where the President will be? No matter how you feel about gun control, how does this not seem like a really bad idea? People, and by people I mean those in law enforcement whose sole job it is to protect our elected leaders are not going to have a sense of humor about this stuff. You are not making a clever statement, you are begging to get yourself in a heap load of trouble. Maybe not fair, but really, where is your head?

- The people planning on shooting at speeding cars with paint ball guns if drivers don’t obey the speed limit. Hilarious, but I totally get it. As I watch people drive through the stop sign at my corner all day long without even a moments pause, I can kind of see why these people have resorted to this. The local police now have to patrol the area to catch the posters of the sign. Not, mind you, to stop the speeders.

- Stephon Marbury. I really don’t care about the pot smoking. I find the fact that he posted it in a public forum, with no sense of irony, amusing at best. The part that gets me: he figures he should not get in trouble because he is not under an NBA contract. Well, NBA contracts do trump, you know, THE LAW. While I might argue that pot is the least of our worries, and that legalizing it and taxing the crap out of it would probably fix the national debt problem, as it stands, the law is the law. Idiot.

- Michael Jackson’s doctor was on YouTube. Who the hell cares? Not me.

-Nancy Grace wrote a book, basically about Nancy Grace. I love crime drama, I may even read it, because why not, but again, do we care? Without sounding insensitive, how long does one retain the rights to milking the hell out of personal tragedy for monetary benefit. Oh wait, see above story re: the Jackson Family.

Oy. Rant now over, I feel much better. Thank you to the blogging world for allowing me a forum in which to express myself. I will not let the fact that probably no one will read this make me feel any less cleansed.



Jana said...

ooh! You should post these more often, then I don't actually have to watch the news. :)