26 May 2010

Open Letter To My Vacuum

Dearest Darling Vacuum,
You no longer suck up cheerios, puffs or bits of yarn.  In our house, this means you are effectively useless.  I have very much enjoyed your company, and relatively clean carpets, but if this generous attempt at cleaning out all your various bits fails to incite a change, you will be evicted.

I already have a replacement all picked out, but I would prefer not to make that purchase right now.  Please, for the love of all that is holy, get your act together and last a few more months so that I need not risk having a brand new vacuum destroyed by whatever sorry excuse for movers the Navy hires for this round.
All my love and adoration,

PS The only thing worse than having to vacuum, is having to clean out the disgusting bits of the vacuum in the hopes that, yes, you might just get to do more vacuuming.  This makes me hate you just a bit more.

PPS Please tell the dyer to hold out for 10 more weeks. While having to dry the loads of laundry in two batches since you can no longer accommodate a full load without generating a horrible noise is annoying, buying a new dryer only to have it dented all to hell in a few weeks is more than I can bear.


Heidi Maxwell said...

Oh dear. I ended up freecycling my old vacuum (whose parts look suspiciously like those in the photo). Tried to craigslist it but there weren't any suckers out there willing to take the bait. At the end, the only way I could get dirt off of the floor was by using the wand attachment and the upholstery brush. Just imagine a 35 week pregnant woman on hands and knees trying to get the house clean for the new baby to arrive. In the heat of June. Oy.

Our new one sounds like a jet engine, but it flipping works! For now.

Dryer: have you tried washing the lint screen with hot soapy water? That fabric softener can build up fast and make your dryer not work so well.

Alexis said...

@Heidi, yeah I am sure I could do more for the vacuum, but since Chris paid like $70 bucks for it 5.5 years ago, I reckon if it hits the recycling center it has been worth it!

No fabric softener here (personally the feel of it on my stuff makes my skin crawl) but it sounds like some bearings are going...again it is about the choice do I spend $200 bucks repairing a dryer I paid $200 for, or do I just recycle and move on?

In addition to being cheap and not wanting to cough up the cash, I just hate to buy new stuff so close to a move. Navy takes the lowest bidder for the jobs so you can imagine how often things get damaged. Better than doing it myself, and they do have to replace what they ruin, but what a pain in the butt!