14 December 2011

Wish List

Lately I have been feeling a little lost in this sea of SAHM-dom.  I have been running less and seeing my friends way less than is desirable.  This is a normal occurrence during this busy time of year, but it is taking its toll.  To cap off the experience Chris is at sea right now* and I am left with the dilemma of being out numbered by the munchkins in my house.  This is not new territory for me, and the kids have been as wonderful as a 4.5 and a 2 year old can be, but it has made me dwell on the things that I (and probably any parent for that matter) would really like in life.

So all I want for Yule is:
  • A day where I can shower, or better yet pee, without anyone smashing on the door and screeching hysterically.
  • A day where I can drive without it sounding like a pack of meth addicted howler monkeys** are in my backseat.
  • A day where nothing crashes to the floor.  No one drops anything, careens into anything or spills anything all over.
  • A day where no one falls down.  For no reason.
  • A day where I sleep until I wake up, not just until the whining begins.
  • A day where I can run without having to chose between 100 pounds of jogger, 45 pounds of jogger or treadmill.
  • A day where I can walk into a room in my house, just one single room, and not see a swath of destruction left behind by my kids or husband.
  • Silence.  
  • Did I already say silence?  Well let me put that one out there again.  Silence.
What I am getting instead is a few days solo parenting, a trip to NY for a big family shindig where I get to explain why my husband is yet again not there and burning the candle at both ends to make it all happen.  On the upside, there is coffee and coffee makes all things doable.  Any other Yule requests out there?

*Yeah, did you see that? Somehow while driving a desk he still manages to be at sea with perfect timing to ruin most of our holiday plans.  So...is he hopeless and needs to be removed from service immediately OR is he the only person in the world who can go out and do this job?  Please, for the sweet love of all that is holy pick one.  I am dying here.

**Monkeys? Monkies?  Dammit,  both spellings look super stupid.


Ginger said...

My request would be to not get headbutted by a crazed toddler at least once a day. I'm so afraid I'm gonna get a broken nose outta that kid.

(also? YIKES. I'm sending you strong-you-can-get-through-this vibes!)