03 November 2013

Remember Sleep? Yeah. Me Too.

We kicked off last week with double strep tests fors the girls. Charlie has her second case of strep in as many months.  It has been so awesome.  If it happens again we all have to get screened to see if one family member is an asymtomatic carrier of a resistant strain. Sweet Jesus, we are so gross. Huge thanks to the doctor for planting the "you are probably carrying a mutant strain" theory in my brain. Bleerggghhhh!

Thankfully that cleared in time for Halloween the rest of the week was spent racing around like crazy people doing all the holiday festivities.  While the kids were better, I the endured a three day migraine that left me nauseous and not exactly my best self.  As a result I lived on coffee, ibuprofen, liquor and the occasional slice of toast for three days.  I lost 5 pounds this week.  So hey, fuck good health, if you want to be thin follow "The Migraine Diet."  It is easy: coffee and pain meds for breakfast, coffee and pain meds for lunch, slice of toast for snack when you think you may finally pass out from low blood sugar or pain, pain drugs for dinner then drinks because, sick kids/crazy schedule.  

By Friday I was a hurting unit. Tired, stressed, in pain and now, for added bonus, hemmorhaging to death (like no joke) because shark week started.  Finally got like 5 uninterrupted hours of sleep on Friday night so felt almost human yesterday.  The universe was not pleased.  The universe does not like a success story.  The universe said "Ha! Not on my watch bitch!" and now Lizzie has the croup.

Croup isn't really life threatening or anything except...last time she had it, it kind of got well, life threatening.  Our last bout with croup had us at the ER, getting multiple steroid treatments and leaving me with the kind of parenting PTSD that ensures your heart stops every time one of your kids so much as clears their throat.  Last night I slept -2 hours.  I figure when you factor in the time change it is actually possible that I got so little sleep that I have bent the space-time continum and somehow added unslept hours to the earth's rotation.  

So here we are.  The time change means that it is either 3AM or maybe 11PM, honestly, it is hard to tell.  I am beyond exhausted, Liz is still sick so I don't  imagine tonight will go much better and Chris leaves tomorrow for four days in DC/Norfolk because, well, why not?  Enjoy your quiet kid free hotel room ya turd.

I am trying not to be a Debbie Downer here, after all I have weathered worse and lived to tell the tale, but frankly, I don't fucking want to.  I want to not spend another winter with someone constantly sick thanks to the general grossness of schools. (Nothing against public schools, but yuck, so many germs kids.) I don't want to spend another night awake listening to my kid cough and forever worrying that it will turn scary at any second.  I certainly don't want to do all this alone because Chris is traveling. So yeah, self-pity, party of one, right here.

I will get the kids to bed.  Make some cocoa and indulge in one evening of wallowing.  Then I will suck it up, kiss my partner goodbye and get on with parenting my kids.  I can do this, yes I can.

For the knowledge that I can handle whatever the universe throws my way, and the fact that my time as a Navy-spouse makes this look like baby-town frolics, I give thanks.